I took a break from my blog and my comics to take a four week intensive writing class. It was an expensive lesson. I payed a lot of money to learn that writing isn't my forte. I am not sure if I should use my hurt and dismay to quit writing all together and focus on art, or if i should use my rejection to fuel an attempt to write an awesome novel that proves everyone wrong? I'm not sure yet.
Before my starting my writing class, I had just given up trying to read 50 shades of Grey.
It was such a terrible book! And the bitch is making millions off of it. I see people on Facebook posting how great it is -- it's infuriating! The sex scenes were too outrageous to be arousing. I think I have already ranted about this book so I won't dwell on it again. But God, If women like this book, they have never had an orgasm before, and the author has obviously never had an orgasm either.
I have the utmost respect for most writers, It's a hard thing to do, creating worlds and stories that capture peoples imaginations.
But Snooki and Lauren Conrad are published Authors!! the publishing world is a tad out of control right now. They are becoming as bad as the record industry -- talent is the least important aspect when signing someone.
I went for a hike yesterday, then came home and pulled weeds in my yard.....ten minutes after my shower, I could barely walk. I am 31 years old, there is no reason why a good workout and some yard work should put me out of commission for the day.
Oh wait, there are plenty of reasons.
I drink, smoke and pop pills...but i ingest a decent amount of milk. Shouldn't that count for something? Maybe I can start a class action suit against the milk association. Myself, and a bunch of other lazy debaucherous assholes can misplace the blame and get beer money.
So here's the thing about skeletons; they are made to support organs, muscles and skin. Not 200 pounds of lard.
I have not written a blog in about two weeks, and I am sure no one has noticed, because no one reads my daily blog. They read the few blogs I have written which have gained momentum. Which is good enough for me, at least some of my babbling is getting the respect it deserves.
Let's see, what has happened in the past two weeks, that I feel deserves some mention?
Well, I tried to read Fifty Shades of Grey. It was terrible! I couldn't finish it, I really tried, but ugh, it was so bad.
Besides the terrible writing, and extremely unbelievable sex scenes, was Miss E.L. James' picture on the book. I may be the only one, but when I would read the book, about a girl who rarely eats, all I could picture was E.L. James at the computer, eating a giant turkey leg and chugging soda.
Last Monday, which was the 30th of April, Ru Paul crowned the Next Drag Superstar; Sharon Needles. I was so happy that Sharon won, I was also relieved.
If Phi Phi 0'Hara would have won, all my faith in Ru Paul would be gone. Not that Ru Paul would care....but I have been a fan of hers since way back.
Well, those are the only two things of interest that I can remember. Have a nice day!
Killing yourself is serious business. Some people feel it's the cowards way out. I don't, I think you have to have some brass balls to face the unknown. For instance, what happens to us when we die, and how bad is it gonna hurt? I recently watched The Bridge.
It's a film about people who commit suicide by jumping off of the Golden Gate bridge. The movie came out in 2006, so I am kind of late on watching it, but I've known about it since it came out if that means anything.
Anyways, it was a very good film and really makes you think. You actually see a few people jump, which is a bit jarring.
Initially, I thought jumping to your death would probably be the scariest way to end it all. At least jumping from a building onto concrete, that seems crazy, but jumping into water (although from certain heights it has the same impact as concrete) doesn't seem that bad.
There is a song from the 90's that romanticizes "jumping", I really like it.
Another song that I really enjoy that talks about suicide is from Suicidal Tendencies.
Although, I like a few songs about suicide, I do not believe I will ever have the gumption to take matters into my own hands. Perhaps, if I thought life was no longer worth living, I would simply live reckless in hopes that I would eventually die.
I am not sure if people still kill themselves by sticking their heads in the oven, but I fell, unless my oven is pristine, I would not be able to end it that way. I would have to make sure my oven is spotless, because to me, the most depressing thing would be to stare at my pathetically dirty oven on the way out of this world.
I always assumed, that if I ever decided to kill myself, I would choose an overdose of pills; until recently. I actually took way too many pills about a year ago, and it sucked. My body felt so weird and it was pretty scary. It got me thinking that a pill overdose might not be all it's cracked up to be, it might actually take a long time. I would hate to slowly die, and by the time I realized that I do want to live, I would die ten minutes after that.
Shooting myself in the head, is definitely not a route I would take. There is far too much room for error. I have heard many a story about people who fucked up, and lived even though half their head was blown off. Can you imagine hating your life with a complete face, then having to continue life deformed? No siree bob.
Hanging ones self doesn't seem to bad, yet it doesn't seem that good either.
If I am gonna end it all, once I make my move, I do not want much pain and especially I do not want any time for reflection.
Better off Dead is a pretty funny movie about suicide. Every time he decides to kill himself, he changes his mind and ends up getting pushed, or fucking it up.
Slitting wrists seems like a "go to" move when it comes to suicide. It seems romantic and all, but too pedestrian for my tastes.
But really, when you are at your wits end, you just use what's available right?
Look at these smug assholes wearing the fur of poor defenseless animals. I really wish someone would at the very least take a wood shaver to them at least once so that they can have some inkling of what they are doing to animals in the name of fashion and status.
It seems that fur is making a comeback, which is truly despicable. It's not like the people wearing fur are caveman in need of warmth during extreme weather. It's rich assholes whom have every comfort available to them.
I used to watch Ice Loves Coco, but that bitch Coco wears fur, so I am done with that imbecilic show. I like to watch mentally disabled people do stupid stuff to entertain me, but not if they do it while wearing fur.
Another show I have given up on is Fashion Police. Joan rivers wears fur, and for a while I was gonna let it go because she is so old, and grew up in a less humane era. But I can't let it go any longer. No one on Fashion Police has voiced any opinion on people wearing fur, it might be due to the fact that the host, Joan, is a fur wearing cunt. Whatever the reason I will boycott that show also.
The first show I banned from my own viewing was Johnny Weirs reality show on Logo. I love the gays, but refuse to be a fan of someone who wears fur. It's an unnecessary evil.
A person who wears fur in a disgusting, self-important creep that needs to be knocked off of their pedestal.
If anyone is wondering what is wrong with the fur trade, look it up yourself, I cannot stomach it.
Fuck curing AIDS, Cancer, or MS; the money is in helping all the lazy creeps in society to get skinnier without having to eat healthy, or exercise. We all know this about our disgusting society. Keeping the sick, sick, makes money, not curing them. And people will pay anything to be able to be lazy pigs, and still look presentable. At least people dying slowly from a disease are usually thin right?
So, now that i am done with my little rant, let's talk about the new quick fix weight loss solutions. I love pills. Not necessarily for the weight loss aspect, but for the euphoric possibilities. I was going to a diet doctor who gave out "phen" pills to his clients. If it weren't for how far away his office is from me; and the fact that i started to get chest pains, i would still be taking them. I have been taking muscle relaxers which are fun, but the problem with those is that you can't take them daily and get the same effect.
If you feel like telling me that i should try sobriety for a while, don't waste your breath; not gonna happen.
I read a lot of magazines, mostly fashion mags, so they have a lot of diet articles. While perusing the ads in one of my magazines recently, I stumbled upon a diet pill add that I have been waiting for. Here are some of the key points of the add that caught my attention:
They're flying off the shelf...
But they're NOT for everyone!
Most of us thought the era of the "Super-Powerful" diet pill ended a few years back when the FDA removed Ephedra and Fen-Phen from the U.S. market because of safety concerns.
"while the pills cause rapid weight loss (no doubt about that), most people buy them as 'speed' pills"
Sir, you had me at speed pills!
I have ordered diet pills that boast euphoric qualities, and they haven't lived up to the hype. Hopefully, these ones are as bad as they are making them out to be. I need a new drug.
Not everyone is like me (obviously) and some people just want a quick weight loss fix.
We have the "nose drip" diet. Which will help you lose ten to twenty pounds in 10 days. I posted a link to the article, basically it just feed you 800 calories through a nose drip. You stay full and satisfied all day, and can drink tea, coffee or water.
Then there is a less evasive stomach stapling procedure that is gaining popularity.
I hate that people get their stomachs stapled, or Gastric Bypass surgery, or the Lap Band. Take Carnie Wilson for instance, she had one of those procedures done, and now she is fat again, AND got another surgery. Her reasoning for the second surgery was that she is really close to getting diabetes and she refuses to get diabetes, so she has to get her stomach stapled again.
Hopefully this video I posted is decent, I really don't feel like sitting through it to make sure. Everyone seems to be talking about this Tupac hologram, so I decided to say my piece on the whole debacle, because so far, all I have heard is praise and awe.
I get it. Tupac is still one of the most beloved rappers ever. He was good looking, and seemed smart....as smart as a sexy, dangerous thug could be. The fact that he was taken from us in his prime only adds to his legend.
I haven't heard any accusations come up that Tupac wasn't the thug that he portrayed in his look and in his music. Maybe because he died from a drive by, people are just happy to believe he was what he said he was. Now, Snoop Dogg and Dr Dre has a very different reputation proceeding them.
I used to like Snoop and Dr Dre. they made good music......emphasis on the word "made". And really, I don't care if my rappers are "street" or not. I enjoy a good song. But I do hate sell outs and most who are revered in today's society.
Eminem was sucking all over Dr Dre's asshole in his last album (which i thought was terrible, but who am I anyway?) and Snoop Dogg is clinging to Whiz Kalifah's young balls with his life.
So, now that I have collected my thoughts, the reason the Tupac Hologram which appeared at the Coachella Festivle this year bothers me so, is that, it was a desperate attempt for two old sycophants to get into the spot light again.
Just like when my favorite, Eazy (muthafuckin) E died, Snoop and Dre exploited that mans memory in a pathetic attempt to sell a "New NWA" album. Which, thank god, tanked.
Easy E didn't like Dr Dre and Snoop Dogg. But, when Easy E was on his deathbed, he made amends with Dr Dre. From what I have heard of deathbeds, you tend to make amends with anyone who is willing. You're about to meet your maker for cripes sake, why not forgive?
Anyways, Dr Dre announced the reconciliation and decided to start the New NWA. Basically he went to Easy E's deathbed with an agenda to make money, not visit an old dying friend.
So, now they will milk tupac's memory as much as possible, and everyone will buy it. What a beautiful world we live in.
