Monday, January 30, 2012

twilight sucks. am i right? i'm right aren't i?

first i would just like to state that i am totally opposed to gay bashing, and using derogatory gay terms. but i thought that comic ^^ was funny. 

i hate the twilight movies, and i think that edward and jacob are soooo stupid looking. especially jacob when he had his crappy hair extensions to make him look more "native".

granted, i never read the twilight books, i wanted to, but once i saw the first movie it just ruined it for me. i assume the reason so many girls love the books is because when you read it, you put yourself in bella's place and it's like a sexy vampire and a buff werewolf want to get with you. i like that premise, i am deep down a teeny bopper till i die. but once i saw robert pattinson and taylor lautner, i knew the book would suck since i would have to picture their ugly mugs the whole time. 

maybe it is because i am old. i am sure there were people who hated the movie interview with the vampire; which is one of my absolute favorites. i am not a fan of tom cruise in any way, but he played a wonderful lestat.

i understand, it is dramatic and a bit cheesy. but lestat was cold (no pun intended) and hilarious. another movie i adore is bram stoker's dracula, directed by francis ford coppola. to me, it is a beautiful love story. a classic.


anthony hopkins plays a hilarious van helsing. it's such a good film, i love it.

but, now as i bow my head in shame, i must admit, i have never seen nosferatu.

OH NO THEY DIDN'T! i just decided to peruse some top vampire movies list and has i am legend starring will smith as number 15. now, their list is compiled by the best reviewed vampire films. what an atrocity. i have never watched the movie, but i have read the book by the great richard matheson. the movie had nothing to do with the book. matheson and his crew (writers of the great twilight zone episodes, true geniuses) were all los angeles based. the i am legend book was set in los angeles, so much that it named many los angeles streets. the movie is set in new york. if will smith did a great performance, that's fine. i honestly don't care to see it. but don't change everything about the book but keep the name to sell tickets. fuckers. i really do hate the entertainment industry.

anyways, looking at the list of top vampire films i realize i haven't seen a lot of the "greats", so this week i guess i will have a vampire bonanza and watch all the top movies that netflix offers. one that looks interesting is called martin.

it is directed by george a. romero, whom i was a huge fan of until he remade his dawn of the dead

i know it's probably because i am a crotchety old woman, but i can't wrap my head around fast moving zombies. but i do understand the urge romero must have had to try and recreate one of his classics now that make up and technology is so much better. i think my problem is that i have loved zombie movies as far back as i can remember and all the classics had slow moving zombies. i totally miss the days when my brother and i were hard pressed to find others into the zombie genre, but when you found them they were aficionados and didn't just like any zombie crap that was shoved down their throat.

now you can't step into a video store without tripping over 5 horrible zombie films. i have seen one episode of the walking dead. BOOOOORING!

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